Careful. That's a trick question. What was the first thought that came to your mind? "Spouse"? "Kids"? "Friends"? "Family"?
How about "Self"?
No, it's not selfish. More like self-preserving.
I'm not saying the other people in your life can't contribute to your happiness. Of course they do - from time to time. Overall. For the most part. But every once in awhile, the stars may not be aligned, and you may not be able to rely on those people for your happiness. Oh, you can rely on them for support... or advice... or encouragement. But happiness?
That's up to you.
I know some people who ride others' coattails for contentment. I've been guilty of it, too. There have been times in my life where I was in a place I wasn't comfortable with - wasn't used to. I needed something familiar because that's what makes me happy. That ended up being a "someone". Yes, it's easy to jump into someone else's life and live it for awhile when you're just not happy with your own. But at the end of the day, it's their life that you're visiting, not yours.
I've been accused of being "too independent". To me, again, it's a form of self-preservation. If I'm going to fail, it's going to be on my watch. If I'm going to succeed, I'm going to reap the rewards all on my own and know that I did it myself. I will appreciate those in my life, and I will realize their value, but I will not rely on them for my happiness. Yes, they are a part of my prosperity, but you never know when one of them might bail, so I'm not going to bank on them for my own bliss permanently, thank you.
Do I slip up? Yes. That's why I write this. I get in my happy place and decide that I can handle turning over the wheel of well-being to someone else and let them determine whether my day is going to be good or bad. Inevitably, I'm disappointed, and I return to the one thing I can count on - and be accountable for - myself.
I'm sure there are differing opinions out there on this - I wait for that email from my mother chiding my opinions - but that's OK. That's the risk I take when writing publicly. And obviously, your comments will be duly noted, and appreciated... but they won't make or break me.
Only I can do that.